Day 6.165 Makes Me Sad

Maybe the correct image is mature happiness. Or enlightened humor.  I dunno.

I contemplated the chasm between why we (the subconscious we - and more me than you) choose unhappiness and its seven dwarfish cousins, anger, doubt, despair, disappointment, fear and disillusionment, rather than happiness.

One of my favorite lines from one of my favorite songs from one of my favorite albums by one of my favorite bands, warns us about the importance of being honest, in: "But the heat came round and busted me for smilin' on a cloudy day."

Silliness is one thing and stoniness another. One should not aspire to become the village idiot, and trust me, there is no bliss in ignorance.

So why then do we opt for frowns when they could just as easily be grins?

I witness this social phenomenon often. I see it in 12 your old Little Leaguers when their team loses as well as adults when the situation doesn't perfectly match their expectation(s).

Rendered to its essential, I think I have a clue.

Because it is easier to be angry than joyous?

One can pick a plethora of reasons to be unsatisfied. I can name you ten without even thinking  (something I am accused of regularly). How about these juicy little ingredients in this recipe for gloom:

    * Gas over $3/gal again.
    * Shell can pollute but grannies can't complain.
    * Decent beer is over $10/six.
    * My laptop is about to die.
    * War again (as always).
    * The Bushes and Clintons again.
    * My woeful state of physical readiness.
    * The alarming increase of vehicular traffic round here.
    * Huskies lose their best palymaker for the season.
    * Jerry died in 1995.

Much like the doctors tell me on a regular basis, with all this (and that is only ten) I SHOULD be depressed.

But I am not.

Conversely I am quite happy. And why not? I have today. Fuck all that negative shit, or the political hypocrisy over which I have no control (don't say it).

The sun is shining and warm, two terrific rides are already in the books, I am heading out to the park to sit in the sun, read, recover and prepare for a twilight run. I have a spin class at 0530 tomorrow morning where twenty people will, under my command, ride themselves into better condition. Me and my nephew are going to visit the Nation's Capitol in 31 days. Both my credit cards have a zero balance.

I might be the happiest idiot on the planet.

Which, of course, makes me sad.