Thursday, April 17, 2014
I am finding more and more value in the principal of addition by subtraction.
Most recent examples being the just recently completed down-scaling of my worldly possessions and my new found affinity for our bread & butter indoor cycling drill, the 2x20.
As I sit with only a laptop and one backpack of clothes (mostly workout gear) I find a new minimalist harmony in the loss of anxiety over all the care, maintenance, storage, use, or direction of the thousand things that once comprised my 'kingdom'. Yes, I always took great satisfaction in having the one part (a 1/4 threaded CPVC coupler) in the shed when needed, but trying to stock a complete hardware store over thirty years created somewhat of an inventory nightmare. Problem solved.
The 2x20 set, twenty minutes at 85% of FTP twice, with a five minute break between, provides double value as it creates the mind/body opportunity. One gets the physical bennies as well as the mental. I truly enjoy settling into the zone and putting stready-state relaxed focus into play. With the opportunity to singularly isolate the task at hand by eliminating noise and distraction at the very top of the benefit list.
Addition by subtraction, two examples. Maybe there are two in your life you could share.
Enjoy the ride.
Wednesday, April 16, 2014
The other factor is my as-yet diagnosed heart condition. When we did the Holter monitor a few weeks back it reported a high of over 200 bpm during the same class, albeit a different protocol. 200! So when my head started to feel the dizzying effects of this morning's work, a splinter of fear snuck in.
Seriously, could I make my own heart explode? Is stroke the fuse? Would I have any warning, like say a flashing red light or alarm?
After the set (labeled dumb, stupid and insane by those in the know) legs went wobbly and HR stayed high long enough for me to drive home, enjoy a yoghurt filled half a cantaloupe and take a nap.
And now we settle back into the flow of this new adventure. That includes the evening 2x20 session in the PowerBarn, our CompuTrainer Multi-Rider Center. (photo)
I wonder if everything is going to hurt more from now on. Yikes.
Tuesday, April 15, 2014
If we are committed to change, then by golly let's change with gusto! Wipe the slate clean and start anew. Fresh. Confident. Enthusiastic. Peel the layers of the past, see the lessons and compost the rest. Keep digging. Grow, move in the direction of hope, of trust, of happiness. Check every consternating detail and amend. Have no fear, tell no lies, Your cup is empty once again, fill with glee.
Everything now is for the first time. Again. You decide the approach, strategy and tactics. The what and the how. Life's little logistics. Rejoin the dance that once overflowed with wonder and magic. It is all attitude. Your call.
Take the bike off the rack, ring the cowbell and saddle up.
The universe awaits your decision and from this perspective seems ready to rock and roll.
All that is necessary is the start. The commitment to change.
Monday, April 14, 2014
Sunday, April 13, 2014
As 'colors' plays from across the still waters of Agate Pass, I muster for the final time here. It is a glorious morning, April 13. I will be leaving tonight. I have manned this station for thirty years, finding solace, release, joy and peace. There has been good times and some sad. There has been growth, change, struggle and challenge. Looking back, I will simply echo a now cliche line from a Dead standard and express with awe at what a long strange trip it has been.
But it's over. The time has come to move along, re-set, and trot down another dusty road. I am OK with it. I think perhaps the dead end I worked myself into, eventually solving via a sale, with provide a cathartic response. I was truly amazed at all the pieces to this puzzle that I accumulated over the years and, I suppose to my credit, the stories, history and emotional attachments to each. A book, a stamp, a t-shirt, photo, coffee mug, CD all quickly and without prolix, replayed their connection in time to me a final time. An encore to an appreciative audience of one, standing, smiling, laughing.
I have this day. There remains a lot to do, but Bill is benevolent in this change of command, granting 'as long as it takes' to finalize the load out. I feel responsible for making the transition as clean as possible, but to detail a structure that has been targeted as a tear-down, seems a bit anal. There remains piles of wood, used tile, slabs of marble, glass and firewood. They come with the dirt and trees.
I am shutting down mobile operations here in the trailer to pack and relocate over to Michael & Kim's, my halfway house for the summer. It will be fun to spend more time with Junior as both Mom & Dad commute to work, your basic win-win. I hope.
I may find that a space to call my own is important.
Even if that space is leaking, falling down and in decay.
Here we go then, we hit the ground running and get 'er done. This must happen, done today. We have started and we will finish.
After taps plays tonight, we're outta here, waking tomorrow in another space to another trip most likely of equal or greater strangeness and hopefully with a bit more time. Every minute counts.
Saturday, April 12, 2014
As much as my lower back hurts, there remains a ton to do. It is almost five. We started early this glorious Saturday with ninety minutes of hill repeats. Each one five minutes in duration, standing at about 80%. A scant two minute break between.
It was demanding. It challenged. There was sweat. But by keeping focus on the flow, eyes on every prize, and with a lot of inspiration from teammates, we made it.
I had the opportunity to tell the story of the Canadian Honkers as antidote. You know the reason they honk when airborne in chevron formation?
To cheer each other on. It is the honk that keeps the formation tight, the speed right and the distance covered. They are talking to each other, providing encouragement and moral support. The captain gets to bark every once in a while for emphasis, but largely it is up to each and every wingman to pull his or her weight, and that of one other. The buddy system at a thousand feet.
I guess a goose bumper sticker might say, "Honk if you dig teamwork."
One more day on the farm. We used to call this spot the Cabin in the Woods. Tonight will be my last sleep here and after a final full day of cleaning tomorrow, I officially turn the keys over to Bill and his clan. I am going to write one last time on the strairway wall wishing them welcome.
It has been fun. We had some magical moments. The cabin is so empty right now that it echos inside. I need to finish this strong. Stay focused. Stay present.
I could use a honk.
Friday, April 11, 2014
Another full, non-stop, hundred-mile-per-hour day. We are down to the final weekend. Two days remain, Saturday & Sunday. I need to be out by midnight Sunday.
I got the real dirty work done today so tomorrow is cleaning up the details. There is not much left. Just accumulated junk and debris, relics of victories past. Mixed with a plethora of artifacts from defeat.
One would think that living in the Pacific Northwest for thirty years would be a decent tenure to learn the carnage potential from relentless rain, but evidence suggests that I need more study.
I hope to take this lesson onward and apply it to whatever building I am left to construct.
Two more days.
There will be tears.