The day has come. Finally. Race day. What will this day bring? Joy? Reward? Value? Defeat? Will questions be answered? Will goals be achieved? Will there be growth? What will I learn? About myself? Others? Life? Spirit and soul? Death and love?
Yeah, race day. Good morning. Very good morning. I am alive. Cells tingle in anticipation. Smells are intensely pure. And with a love like that, ya know ya can't be sad. I hear in sympathetic harmony a thousand heartbeats slapping out a 5/4 groove. It is the snare drum staccato calling out the long dormant heroic behind the rallying bagpipes in a pre-dawn call to arms. There is something that needs to be defended here. Freedom? Dignity? Honor?
As I indulge in the sensual electricity surrounding me and retake control of my breathing, there seems to be a powerful synergy taking place as I am at once calm and confident and simultaneously craving the wild rawness of the unknown. It vibrates my DNA. I am again an animal, hungry and focused on the hunt. This must be done.
Something moves. I see, understand and analyze with blazing quickness and realize that my powers, now, here, are at their apex, unlimited. I feel muscle twitch, lung expand and stomach tighten. I smile. THIS, is the good fight.
Energy. Mine. Ours. I didn't get here alone. It took a team, a support group, a coach, the wisdom of those that have stood here before me, artists, politicians, scholars, technicians, philosophers, caddies, cabbies, and cooks. I am defined by others. The stronger, faster and wiser push me ever onward. Even now I wonder, how fast can I go?
Indeed. How fast? I am grateful for this opportunity, happy for the challenge. I want to pray, to say thanks, to give back, to help others. I am filled with the deepest empathy imaginable. I love.
For what seems like the hundredth time I look at my watch and shiver my loins, trying to shake out some thunder as the seconds slowly pass. Time is artificial in this vacuum of emptiness. There is nothing here but me. No war. No hyperbole. No conflict. No impossible paradox to decipher by noon. I am koan. Just me. Just my thoughts. I, haiku. And just this distance between where I now stand and where I want to be.
With a soothing amplified urgency I hear a voice announce thirty seconds to start and I prepare for the final count-down by adding my personal strategic commentary to the chaos and choreography:
10-Relax.
9-You are ready, have no fear.
8-Enjoy the day.
7-Breathe.
6-Go out slow.
5-Be humble, be grateful, be kind.
4-Be confident, be strong, be smart.
3-Drink lotsa water.
2-A thousand times YES.
1-She loves you, yeah, yeah, yeah.
GO.
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