John & Robert

McCain picks Mugabe as running mate.

Republican presidential candidate John McCain today announced that he has asked Robert Mugabe of Zimbabwe to be his running mate in the upcoming elections.

"We feel that Robert gives us the complete package, he is a fierce negotiator, a fearless crusader for the principals that this party holds dear, and a tireless worker to bring about electoral outcomes."

Mugabe, who was reached while vacationing in The Hague, said by phone that while he considers the ticket to be somewhat unorthodox and possibly even illegal under U.S. Constitutional guidelines, he doesn't see that as an issue. "Never in my political, military or diplomatic career have I allowed a little thing such as the law stand in the way of progress. And I would like to reward all those who voted for me in our last election by providing the spoils that only being the preeminent African conservative Republican can bring."

Several political analysts were quick to call the selection a winner. Karl Rove called it, "a rare combination of unique personalities and contrasts." while at CNN Wolf Blitzer hailed the move as "absolutely visionary".

Democratic candidate Barack Obama could not be reached for comment as he was speaking to a sold out Madison Square Garden audience of MENSA members.

At the news, oil jumped to $200 a barrel.